Who can you trust these days? If you can't trust even Sebald to tell the truth about a simple tree, what has the world come to?

I'm not sure I even trust myself to tell this story straight. To locate myself online is to immediately set myself apart from the truth of things.

And as you sit there staring at the computer screen, how much of this are you taking in and actually believing? 90 per cent? 70 per cent?

If I asked you to tell me the truth about your life, how much would you expect me to believe? You see, we're all playing games with our past. We're just sometimes dealing from different packs.